Ramble On

I used my (new) sewing machine for the second time ever yesterday when I got some fabric I ordered to make a little curtain for Eldest's bed. It was amazing, I got the mail, opened the package, took it right downstairs and sewed the curtain. I actually used a craft supply the way I had meant it to be used and in a (very) timely manner! I was actually shocked while I was doing it and especially afterward. It turned out so well. I know it's just a simple curtain but I love it so much and I'm so proud of myself that I actually did something that I wanted and had planned to do. Also the kid loves it, and who wouldn't like a squirrel treasure map curtain?

Oh yes I have proof:


Yesterday was an amazing day. I got very little sleep, it snowed, school was canceled. I was mindful about my temper I did not yell at. all. yesterday.

Today however, was another story. Everything I did today seemed in vain. I scrubbed the floor in the kitchen and then served the children lunch. The baby dropped an entire bowl of macaroni and cheese on to the floor.

Later on Eldest was goofing around (after he was told not to) and did some sort of ninja move right into the baby's snack bowl which flipped into the air and sprayed gluten all over the room. After that got cleaned and the baby was up taking her nap the other two were using colored pencils and had to sharpened some which got little wood shavings all over the carpet. I had to vacuum three times today.

I made a mistake and forgot to put the gate up between the kitchen and the living room. My baby is a climber, she climbed onto the table got her older sister's cherry Pepsi and brought it into the living room to show off her prize. Now, my kids aren't allowed to have drinks in the living room cause they always always get spilled. Middle Girlie moved towards the baby too fast, she got spooked and dropped the drink which dumped all over the carpet. This is the point where I yelled.

It was mostly because I was frustrated with myself, why couldn't anything go right today? I went out into the kitchen to make dinner. I was tired. I was frustrated. I was sick of vacuuming. The kids didn't do anything out of the ordinary today they were being kids. I took the time right then and there while making my chicken stock to pray. I didn't have a verse I was thinking of I just had to do it but what I thought I wanted to pray for didn't come out, what did was a prayer for my husband.

What the heck?

I think I realized in that moment that these were my challenges and I choose my reaction to them and instead of reacting the way I wanted to I threw a fit. I wasn't out in a snowstorm trying to get to work, my husband was doing that. I don't want to go into other things that are going on that are work-related because it is not my place to talk about that, but I prayed for him and for what he was doing for our family so that I could be home with these kids. I'm grateful. I am not a perfect mother but I'm trying, and I will try again tomorrow.