Ramble On

I spent most of the day huddled up inside avoiding the cold rain and cuddling with my 3 year old who just asked me, "Mommy is tomorrow going to be spring? I really miss my bike."

Be still my heart.

We've decided to look into a charter school for the older kids and I'm a little conflicted about it. I really like the kids that my kids go to school with, I like that fact that the school(s) are 10 and 15 minutes away from the house, we've also had good experiences with most of the teachers in our district, however the curriculum leaves a lot to be desired for my academically gifted Eldest child and it's not their fault at all. The state has been cutting funding for the schools for years now and, quite frankly, there is not a demand for gifted education in the district if there are only a few kids that really need it. My son has already skipped a grade and is accelerated up to the next grade in math but other than that there is not much more that the district can offer him and this charter school that we're looking in to seems to be able to provided all of that and smaller class sizes, also, it's free.

I don't really like to talk about my gifted kid because people like to roll their eyes and make comments to the effect that I'm bragging about him but in reality raising a gifted child is a struggle, just like raising any other child who is different from the norm only people don't really care to talk about the gifted kids. At least your kid is smart they say, at least they can get through school, and yes that's true and I'm grateful but it's also a challenge but the support is lacking and it's hard to do this on your own with no real guidance (save for the internet my husband and I would feel completely alone).

So that's what we've been up to for now and of course, knitting, which never stops in this house.

It's been snowing here for three days so we've been inside and I've been doing the normal mom things, you know, laundry, cooking, feeding the troops, baking. My God the laundry, so.much.laundry. I don't want to think about how bad it is going to be when the kids are teenagers.

Doing all these tasks has given me the opportunity to let my mind wander and I've been thinking about my future and the future of our family. We're done having kids and our littlest will miss the cut off for Kindergarten by a couple of week so she'll be home with me for two more years. Hubby and I have been talking about my going back to school at that time but I"m not sure what I really want to do. I think I want to go back just to make it look like I'm making an effort because I'm honestly afraid that I will never be able to find a job with my current skill set, other than baby sitter I mean.

I have an English degree, which I really did enjoy getting, but it was probably just a big waste of money. I really don't want to take out any more loans to get a degree I'm not going to use soI need to make sure I go do something that will be worth the cost of actually getting the degree.

The whole thing is frustrating and confusing and I just simply do not know what I want to do. I'm not looking for advice or anything just venting and letting it go. Maybe I'll figure it out by the time I need to do something about it. I think the main issue I'm having right now that I have no idea what we are doing or where we are going to be in two years of course I realize no one really knows what is going to happen in their lives but at least most people, or some people, have a plan. My husband's carrier is really up in the air right now and some times I don't know if he knows what he wants to do when he grows up either and that sort of throws a wrench in things, especially when you are a one income family.

I'm not really what the point is of this post just something I felt like I had to let go of. Love to you all that might be reading this.

The other night I was making my family some milkshakes and feeling sorry for myself that I can no longer have ice cream. I'm a pretty good shake maker thanks to my Grandmother who ran a resturant for quite a few years and let me experiement behind the counter.

It bothered me for a couple of days and this morning I attempt to make a passable shake and I think I did it.

Ingredients
1/2 cup SCD legal yogurt
1 frozen banana
1 tsp organic vanilla
1tsp honey

Blend everything together and enjoy.

I can't taste the banana in this but if I have something "banana" flavored I want to really taste the banana and use several so in this it just serves to make the shake creamy and seems to work. Let me know what you think if you try it.